No Need for Chibis!
by cocolatte
Summary: Yeah, yeah, we've all read the stories where the guys get turned into chibis. But what happens when it's the GIRLS who get turned into toddlers?
1. Chibified!

Cheeto: Lookie Sensei, it's my second story!!  
  
Sensei: Does that mean you'll stop crying that Broken Past is over?  
  
Cheeto: No . . . . . . .WAAAAAA!!!  
  
Sensei: *sighs* Okay, anyways, this story is what happens when the girls get turned into Chibis, hence, the guys have to take care of them. Couples include Yusuke/Keiko, Kurama/Botan, and probably a little Yukina/Kuwabara.  
  
As you can see, this is a non-yaoi story.  
  
Cheeto: And incase you were wondering, I DO own Yu Yu Hakusho.  
  
Sensei: I thought Yoshihiro Togashi did.  
  
Cheeto: LIES AT THE PATENT OFFICE!!  
  
Sensei: He's twenty years older than you, Cheeto.   
  
Cheeto: Fine then! I don't really own it, but I'm in denial! ^-^  
  
Sensei: . . . .x-X. Cheeto was unsure what to rate it since it does have language, so its PG because of that. If you don't agree, then just email me or something.-_-u  
  
Oh yeah, *This means thoughts*  
  
*~Chapter One~* - except that ^-^  
  
Suzuka snuck in through the back door of Genkai's temple, holding a glass bottle full of red liquid.  
  
"Ha! I will finally have my revenge on the Urameshi team! How dare they insult the mysterious and beautiful Suzuka! After they are turned into children, I will destroy them, making myself even more great and mysterious!"  
  
Lucky for him, and oddly convenient, a tray of tea was located near by. He tip toed over to it, pouring quite a bit of red liquid into each of the five cups.  
  
"Ha! With my new and much more effective formula, this should be enough to keep them young for a week, maybe two!" He laughed insanely, "I am truly the most ingenious and handsome demon there is!" He heard a scuffling near the door and gasped, bolting out the door from which he came.  
  
Genkai came and took the tray, not noticing anything strange about it. As she entered the main room and sat down, all the girls reached for a cup.  
  
"So, Genkai, when are the boys supposed to be back?" Keiko asked. The old woman shrugged.  
  
"I'm not sure, Koenma didn't specify." Botan frowned as she drank a bit of the tea.  
  
"Is it just me, or does this tea taste a bit strange?" Shizuru shrugged.  
  
"Have a smoke, anything tastes better with it." Botan sweat dropped.  
  
"Shizuru, I don't think that's good for your health." Yukina warned, and the girl shrugged, chugging the drink and resting back, lighting up a cancer stick.  
  
"Ah, who cares, you only live-" She was cut of as she saw a flash of bright white light.  
  
***  
  
"Hey old lady, we're back!" Yusuke called as he and the other boys stumbled into the shrine, battle scarred, but too to badly.  
  
"Grandma!"He yelled angrily. "Where the hell is my welcoming party?!" He felt a gentle tugging on his pants, and looked down. A pair of big brown eyes stared up at him.  
  
"Who are you?"   
  
The girl just stared.  
  
"What are you doing in Genkai's temple?"   
  
More staring.  
  
"Don't you talk?!"   
  
Silence.  
  
"Stop staring at me!"  
  
"Uh, Urameshi . ." Kuwabara babbled and pointed towards the far end of the room. Four other children sat there, doing various things. There was one with blue hair, and one with green hair and . . .  
  
Yusuke's eyes widened. "You have got to be kidding me!" Kurama went over to the little blue haired girl and knelt down in front of her.  
  
"Botan?" She looked up at him with huge raspberry eyes.   
  
"Are you a girl?"  
  
"Hey, Kurama, even your girlfriend thinks you look like a girl!" Kuwabara snickered, causing the fox to blush lightly.  
  
"She's not my girlfriend!"  
  
"I'm your girlfriend?!" The four year olds eyes got even bigger,( if possible) and jumped up into his arms, clinging to his neck. "Let's get married!"  
  
The two punks laughed, receiving I'll-kill-you-in-your-sleep glares from the fox. Then Kuwabara spotted the little green haired girl.  
  
"Yukina!" he ran over to her, but the fire demon beat him to it, cradling the little girl in his arms.  
  
"What the hell are you-" He felt a tug on his leg.  
  
"Pick me up you baka!" Chibi Shizuru shouted, Kuwabara sweat dropping. He obeyed when she raised a fist.  
  
"Now where's my pack, I need a smoke." Yusuke had been studying Keiko intently.  
  
"Say something."  
  
"Anything?"  
  
"You can talk, right?"   
  
Nothing.  
  
"What happened to them?" Kuwabara muttered as he looked around, nothing seemed out of the ordinary.  
  
"It was that Baka clown, I can sense his energy anywhere." Hiei muttered, frowning, "He must have used that aging drink . ."  
  
"Uh, guys . ." A little pink haired girl sat staring up at them confusedly.  
  
"Tell me that's not Genkai."  
  
"Well it wears of, right?!" Yusuke demanded, "Tell me it wears off!" Kurama nodded, trying to pry little Botan's hands from around his neck.  
  
"Yes, it should in about fifteen minutes."  
  
Fifteen minutes later . . . .  
  
"I'M HUNGRY!" Shizuru yelled, "MAKE ME A SANDWICH!" Kuwabara winced, she had been screaming that for the past ten minutes. All attempts to shut her up lead to biting and even louder shrieking.  
  
"Let's just take them home!" Kurama yelled over the wailing girl, "Maybe it'll wear off later!"  
  
"Who's house?!"  
  
"Mine, my mother is out of town!" Kurama shouted as they made their way outside and to the fox's house.  
  
Once there, Shizuru was still on her rampage.  
  
"DAMMIT KUWABARA JUST MAKE HER A FRICKEN SANDWICH!" Yusuke yelled, Kuwabara going over to the fridge, grabbing various things and making a sandwich.  
  
He placed it in front of the girl, who immediately quieted. She lifted the piece of bread, examining it.  
  
"IT'S HAM! I HATE HAM! I WANT PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY!" She picked it up and threw it at the carrot head, pouting.  
  
"Kurama, do you have peanut butter and jelly?" He couldn't answer, as Botan still had her death grip on him, making him unable to talk as he tried to wrestle her off. So the two boys just went tearing through the cabinets until they found peanut butter and jelly, making her a sloppy sandwich.  
  
"THERE'S A CRUST! I HATE CRUST! AND IT'S SUPPOSED TO HAVE PEANUT BUTTER ON BOTH SIDES!"  
  
"EAT THE DAMN SANDWICH!" Yusuke yelled back. Shizuru stuck her tongue out at him, but obeyed, not seeming too happy about it.  
  
Hiei rolled his eyes and looked down at his sister, sleeping peacefully in his arms, undisturbed by Shizuru's screeching. He was lucky, he got the little angel.  
  
"WHERE'S MY DRINK?! I WANT JUICE-!" Shizuru screeched.  
  
"STOP WHINING!" Genkai yelled, tackling the girl to the floor. They began punching each other, pulling hair, biting, slapping . . .  
  
It took both Kuwabara and Yusuke to pry the two four year olds apart, the two girls glowering at each other.  
  
"Uh, what do we do when they fight?" Kuwabara asked, Yusuke shrugging.  
  
"Give 'em pointers?"  
  
"Time out!" Kurama gasped, holding the little Botan an arms length away. "Send each of them to a corner and make them stay there for ten minutes, quietly."  
  
The two looked at each other and shrugged, "Yeah, do what he said."  
  
They did as told, muttering under their breaths. Keiko pulled on Yusuke's pant leg, and he gently picked her up.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Can I have a sandwich?" she whispered and he nodded, making her a much nicer peanut butter and jelly. Kurama came over and put Botan in a chair, making sure she didn't try and jump tackle him, along with Hiei and a now awake Yukina, feeding the little kids.  
  
"I wonder how long the effects will last."  
  
"Let's hope not long." After the girls were finished, with half the sandwiches on their faces, Yukina turned to Hiei.  
  
"Hiei-kun, can I have a toy?" Hiei blanched. *What the hell?*  
  
Botan grinned, "YEAH! I want a toy!"  
  
Kurama frowned, "I don't have any . ."  
  
But it was Keiko who let out the piercing wail, "TOY NOW!"  
  
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*  
  
Cheeto: How's that for a first chapter?  
  
Sensei: *sighs* Review please! 


	2. We want BARBIE!

Cheeto: Hiya peoples! According to Sensei and my Lawyer, I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho.  
  
Dang.  
  
. . . . . .  
  
. . . . . .  
  
*humming*  
  
do de do de do  
  
. . . . . .   
  
Cheeto: Well, I've got nothing to talk about! On with the story!!  
  
Sensei: *sweatdrops*  
  
Cheeto: Oh yeah!!!  
  
**Jess: *blocks Yukina* Ohhh, no. I aint leaving you two alone!! Gawd your evil!!!  
  
**Evil Towel: No, you weren't the first reviewer, but that's okay! *huggles*  
  
**Luna Stargazer: Um, sorry you don't like Kurama/Botan, but I do. And I don't like yaoi,(any yaoi). It's just not my thing. So if you don't like it, then don't read it. And as far as I know, it is spelled Suzuka. (I'm going with the dubbed version, since it's the only one I've seen. I get all the spelling from Tvtome.com)  
  
Anyways, lets get back to the story!  
  
  
  
*~Chapter Two~*  
  
  
  
Kurama and Hiei where sifting through boxes upon boxes, looking for Shuichi's old toys, and not having much luck. The dust was billowing up everywhere, making it almost impossible to see.  
  
"Here we go!" Kurama said in triumph, picking up a box and opening it. Thank Kami his mother kept a hold of everything he ever had.  
  
Hiei looked over his shoulder as Kurama pulled out all kinds of action figures and various toy cars. Hiei picked up one with the stickers still attached.  
  
"Super Sam with awesome kicking action?" he raised an eyebrow and pulled the lever a little red arrow pointed to, casing the action figures leg to jerk. Hiei snorted loudly, it was the only thing he could do to keep from laughing out loud.  
  
"What you ningens think of." Kurama glared and grabbed Super Sam, throwing it in the box as the two headed up the stairs.  
  
  
  
"Play with Mr. Tostito bag man." Kuwabara said and tossed a bag of chips at the girls. Shizuru and Genkai's timeout had run out, and now they had joined the onslaught.  
  
"No, that's dumb!" Keiko yelled and threw it back at him. She seemed to have gotten over her shyness rather quickly.  
  
"How about this kitchen knife?"  
  
"Urameshi!"  
  
"What?" Kurama and Hiei appeared, carrying a box and sitting it on the floor. Kurama opened it, exposing all the old toys.  
  
"That's boy stuff!" Yukina yelled, pouting, surprising everyone. Shizuru seemed to have taken an interest in G.I. Joe and his semi-automatic machine gun, but that was about it.  
  
Botan daintily picked up Super Sam, eyes big and sparkling. She clutched it tightly, grinning. "My love has given it to me, and therefore it is sacred!" All the guys looked at the fox and snickered, until . . .  
  
"Barbie!" Keiko yelled, "I want BARBIE!"  
  
"Barbie?" Yusuke looked around, "Who the hell is Barbie?"  
  
"And Ken!" Botan squealed. The girls danced around, then stopped at the boys blank faces.  
  
"Go get us BARBIE!"  
  
"AND KEN!"  
  
"NOW!" Kurama and Hiei looked at Yusuke and Kuwabara.  
  
"Ain't no way in Hell I'm being seen buying a Barbie!" Kuwabara yelled, causing Hiei to smirk.  
  
"I'm sure you have the collection at your house, what's the difference?"   
  
"Shut up Shrimp!"  
  
"Maybe Keiko's parents have some of her old ones." Kurama suggested, "Why don't you check at her house?"  
  
The two boys sighed, "Good idea," and ran out of the house, leaving Hiei and Kurama with five little girls.  
  
"PLAY WITH US!"  
  
***  
  
  
  
"Barbie, Barbie . ." Yusuke muttered, looking around Keiko's room. Her parents where at the ramen shop, so the two boys just invited themselves in and started ripping through the girls room.  
  
"Hey, look Urameshi!" Kuwabara yelled and grabbed a box. It was an original 1964 Wedding Barbie and Wedding Ken, box never been opened, first one off the assembly line, only original known to exist.  
  
"Alright!" Yusuke yelled, stuffing the box under his shirt, "Let's get out of here." They left Keiko's room looking like a tornado hit it.  
  
"Look what I have!" Yusuke yelled, producing the box. All the girls screamed in glee and ran over, ripping into it.  
  
"Thank God." Kurama sighed, Hiei's eye twitching uncontrollably. The girls had decided they would play dress up while waiting for Yusuke and Kuwabara, and had spent the last ten   
  
minutes chasing the two boys around Kurama's house with a wide array of Shiori's dresses.  
  
"Okay, so Ken and Barbie are getting married." Keiko said as all the girls sat in a circle on the floor.  
  
"No, Barbie and Kurama-" The doll, Super Sam, in which Botan had lovingly dubbed 'Kurama' appeared, "Because he's cuter than Ken." Snickering and more death glares.  
  
"Here Yukina, you can be Barbie." Botan said. Yukina took the doll and looked at it strangely, "Okay!" She chirped. Apparently Barbie play was universal.  
  
"Yeah, until Joe comes in with his bazooka gun!" Shizuru said and plowed into Ken with the soldier.  
  
Genkai ran off for a moment, then reappeared with a bottle. She grabbed Ken and popped his head off.  
  
"And now Ken's dead." She squirted the ketchup all over the place, "And this is his blood."  
  
"GASP!" Keiko cried, handing the decapitated doll to Yukina, "Use your healing powers to revive Ken!" Yukina's hands glowed, but after a second she burst into tears.  
  
"It won't work!"   
  
"It's okay, I'll have Kurama do it." she picked up the two pieces of Ken and ran over to Kurama, (the human, not the doll). "Can you heal him?"  
  
Kurama took the pieces, staring at the ketchup, "What . .?"  
  
"Oh, that's his blood." Kurama stared at the group of smiling girls, struggling to pop the dolls head back on.   
  
(Anyone who has ever had a Barbie will know once the head comes off, it doesn't go back on.)  
  
"Give it to me." Hiei snapped, snatching the doll. Kurama watched, amused, as the fire demon had an even harder time.  
  
"Damn Baka Ningen doll!" With that, he melted Ken's head.  
  
  
  
"AH!" Keiko screamed and snatched the doll back. "Oh no! Now Ken got injured in a smelting accident and can't marry Barbie cause he's DEAD!"  
  
"Therefore, but process of elimination, Barbie is Kurama's." Botan huffed. More snickers.  
  
"I liked Ken." Yukina said, and began to cry harder.  
  
"Don't cry my sweet!" Kuwabara said, running in from the kitchen. "I, the great Kazuma Kuwabara, can fix your doll!" He grabbed the doll, holding something up from behind his back.  
  
"With the power of duct tape!" Everyone sweat dropped as he wrapped the tape around Ken's head until it was a big ball of silver with some melted plastic sticking out. He handed the doll to Yukina, who smiled.  
  
"I think he's beautiful." Kuwabara blushed and Hiei snorted. *Baka*  
  
"I think he's a freak." Shizuru said lazily.  
  
"Like you?" Genkai demanded, causing Shizuru to grab the girls ketchup and squirt it in Genkai's face. Genkai then ran into the kitchen and appeared with an apple and a huge toothpick.  
  
She stabbed the apple rapidly with the toothpick, then threw the desecrated fruit.  
  
"Apple bomb!" It hit the ground, apple chunks flying everywhere and hitting everyone in the vicinity. All the other girls jumped to their feet and sprinted for the kitchen.  
  
"Food fight!" Botan yelled as she sprayed Keiko with the easy cheese, who returned the attack with whipped cream. Shizuru still had control of the ketchup, and Genkai was chucking various fruits at everyone.  
  
Yukina, on the other hand, was ducking behind a cabinet door when she discovered the soda. Shaking up a two liter, she hit everyone with a blaze of Mountain Dew.  
  
"Keiko, get over here!"Yusuke yelled to get a face full of whipped cream, the little girl screeching in delight and running across the tile. Hiei was blocking his face from a spray of Dr. Pepper as he tried to get to Yukina, who was chucking cans at him too. Kurama was trying to reach Botan, who had somehow gotten on top of the refrigerator and enjoyed dumping various food articles on his head.  
  
Kuwabara slipped on the soda as he chased after his sister, who had abandoned her previous weapon and was now flinging syrup and vinegar. Genkai, who noticed no one was chasing after her, was using a huge wooden spoon as a sort of catapult for ice cream.  
  
Keiko reached the open refrigerator and Yusuke grinned. "Now I got ya!" She quickly turned and grabbed the eggs, shrieking as she chucked them everywhere, hitting just about everyone. Botan had somehow gotten down and out of Kurama's reach, and had dumped a whole gallon of milk onto him.  
  
Yukina was throwing Cereal while Shizuru had found the cookies, and was stuffing her face full of those when Kuwabara grabbed her. Hiei finally got Yukina and Kurama had resorted to plant life to grab the ever so resourceful Botan.  
  
"Come back here!" Yusuke yelled as Keiko climbed up the cabinets, her feet knocking over the shelves, sending box upon box onto his head, not to mention many a gooey thing like honey and vanilla.  
  
Finally he caught her foot and yanked her down, all of the boys looking at Genkai, now armed with jelly.  
  
"Fight to the death!" she cried, throwing fistfuls at them. Yusuke ran forward and grabbed the back of her shirt, holding her up to eye level.  
  
"You may have won the battle, but you haven't won the war!"  
  
"Wanna bet?" Yusuke sneered, "it's bath time."  
  
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*  
  
Cheeto: heheh- I'm evil. Review!! 


	3. Bath time!

Cheeto: Hi peeps. Sorry it took so long to update, I had a term project due for World Civ. I don't own yu Yu, so read and enjoy!  
  
"Botan, get back here!" Kurama yelled as the little girl giggled in glee, scurrying down the stairs, enveloped in two towels as he chased her. Kurama was soaked, covered in food, and not happy.  
  
Hiei, his hair drooping from Dr. Pepper, carried Yukina into the bathroom. He emerged ten minutes later with the girl wrapped in a pink towel, soaked with water, grumbling as Yukina pulled Lucky Charms out of his hair and ate them. Yukina had found it funny to freeze the water, making Hiei thaw it, just to freeze it again.  
  
Kuwabara and Yusuke grabbed the three remaining girls, dumping them in the empty tub, turning on the water.  
  
"Uh, shouldn't we take their clothes off?" Kuwabara said, blushing, "I mean, they are little kids, but . ."  
  
Yusuke shrugged, "Well their clothes are dirty, right? So we're killing two birds with one stone."  
  
"Bath toys!" Keiko shrieked, "I want bath toys!" Kuwabara and Yusuke sighed.  
  
"Fine, hang on." They left, Shizuru grinning.  
  
"Bubbles, we definitely need bubbles." She grabbed the bottle of shampoo, squirting all of the contents into the still running bath water.  
  
Yusuke and Kuwabara climbed up the stairs, holding Barbie and desecrated Ken, along with some toy cars.  
  
"Hey, Urameshi, why's the carpet all wet?"  
  
"Oh, come on Kuwabara, couldn't you hold it?"  
  
"HEY! What the hell is that supposed to mean?!" They opened the door.  
  
"OH NO!" A wall of bubbles and water crashed down onto them, the girls giggling hysterically. Kurama had come upstairs to see what see the fuss was about when he saw all the water. He ran into the bathroom and shut off the faucet, turning back to the boys.  
  
"Oh, hey Kurama-"  
  
"OUT!" He yelled, face contorted in rage. The two punks, fearing for their lives, scrammed. Kurama sighed, turning to the three grinning girls, and ran this fingers through his hair.  
  
Twenty minuted later, he walked down the stairs and joined the others in the living room, sitting down on the couch.  
  
"Kuwabara, Yusuke, you might want to get your stuff, looks like you'll be here a while."  
  
The two boys nodded and ran out of the house. The little girls watched as Kurama got some big t-shirts for them until their clothes were washed, along with some blankets. He lay them down on the floor, all the girls crawling under the covers and yawning.  
  
"STORY!"  
  
***  
  
Yusuke tip toed into his house, throwing some clothes and necessities into a bag. He pressed a finger to his lips to Kuwabara, motioning to him to be quiet.  
  
"WHERE THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOUR GOING?!" A voice rang out, Yusuke cursing under his breath.  
  
"Uh, hi mom!" he grinned, scratching the back of his head. "I'm uh . .going to Kuwabara's, to . .do homework, yeah!"  
  
Atsuko came up, glaring at him, "Since when do you do your homework?"  
  
Yusuke sweat dropped. *Damn, I had to catch her the only time she isn't drunk!*  
  
"Since now?"   
  
She raised an eyebrow, then laughed giddily. "Okay, have fun now!" And stumbled back into the kitchen.  
  
The two boys sweat dropped, and headed over to Kuwabara's.  
  
***  
  
"Hiei, tell us a story!" Keiko yelled. The fire demon frowned.  
  
"Once upon a time there were five brats that needed to go to sleep. The end."  
  
"That story sucks!" Genkai yelled, throwing a pillow at him. "Tell us a different one!"  
  
"Once upon a time there were five brats that needed to go to sleep NOW if they wanted to continue LIVING! The end." The girls' eyes got larger and they turned over, falling asleep almost instantly.  
  
Just then Kuwabara and Yusuke burst through the door.  
  
"Hey guys, what-"  
  
"SHH!" The two hissed, pointing to the sleeping girls.  
  
"They're asleep? It's only-"  
  
"Shut up!" The two demons hissed.  
  
"Ohh." Kuwabara and Yusuke nodded, tip toeing over. Kurama looked up a the wrecked kitchen and the destroyed bathroom, sighing heavily. *Well this is going to be fun.*  
  
  
  
Botan opened her eyes, looking around. It was three in the morning, and she wasn't sleepy anymore. She shook the girl next to her.  
  
"Yukina, are you awake?" The ice demon opened her eyes and nodded. They went around and shook everyone, but Keiko was the only other one awake. The girls got up quietly, looking at the boys.  
  
Kuwabara was laying on the ground, snoring loudly, Eikichi curled up on his chest (who he had decided to bring along). Kurama had collapsed on the couch, Yusuke slumped in a recliner. Hiei was sitting up against the wall, but it was apparent that he, too, was asleep.  
  
"What do ya wanna do?" Keiko whispered, Botan smiling.  
  
"Let's color!" They ran over to the kitchen. Yukina grabbed a bowl and stood on it, looking through the various drawers.  
  
"Will these work?" she asked quietly, holding up three big, fat, black permanent markers.  
  
"Yeah!" Keiko yelled, then clapped her hand over her mouth. They looked around, but everyone was still asleep.  
  
They each took one, Yukina looking around. "But what do we draw on?"  
  
The girls looked around, Botan smiling. "The walls, silly!"  
  
***  
  
Yusuke got up, yawning as he shuffled into the bathroom. *Bang* He backed up, shaking his head. Oh yeah, there was a wall there. He tripped up the stairs, grabbing his toothbrush and rummaging around Kurama's cabinet for toothpaste. He closed the cabinet and looked in the mirror.  
  
"AHHHHH!" The piercing shriek woke up everyone in the house.  
  
"What's up Urameshi?" Kuwabara said lazily as he looked up the stair way, then burst into laughter.   
  
Yusuke had two huge black circles around his eyes, a big black moustache, and various hearts and stars dotting his cheeks and forehead. Not to mention the uni-brow.  
  
"Oh, no." Kurama muttered. Yes, bringing the girls to his house had definitely been a mistake. Marker drawings covered the wall within a two foot radius of the floor. Hearts, stars, stick figures, stick animals, squiggles, happy suns, and just about everything else you could imagine radiated from the white walls. But one in particular caught Kurama's eye.  
  
It was a picture of a tall stick figure with long hair and a short one. There was a caption next to it: Karaama luvis Botan, (with the exception of backwards letters, of course.)  
  
He turned to the little girls, Yukina, Botan, and Keiko all hiding their hands behind their backs and averting their eyes. Kurama looked at them sternly.  
  
"Show me your hands." They shook their heads.  
  
"Now." They did, their little fingers covered in black marker. But before he could say anything, the three burst into tears. Botan wailed something, but he couldn't make it out.  
  
"What?"  
  
"We couldn't–find–any–PAPER!!" she howled, hiccuping in between words. Kurama's expression instantly softened.  
  
"Are–you–mad–at–me?" He smiled and shook his head, the girl instantly stopped crying, along with the other two.  
  
"I love you Kurama!" she chirped, latching herself onto his leg. "I can't wait for the honeymoon!" More snickering.  
  
"Hey!" Shizuru yelled, "I wanna color too!"  
  
"Markers!" Genkai chirped.  
  
"No, crayons!" Shizuru shouted.  
  
"Markers!"  
  
"Crayons!  
  
"MARKERS!"  
  
"CRAYONS!" It was about to escalate into all out war until . .  
  
"Colored Pencils!" Yukina declared. The two girls, who were about to strangle each other (or be killed by Hiei first), looked at her.  
  
"COLORED PENCILS!" All five girls screamed at the tops of their lungs. Kuwabara looked at Kurama.  
  
"Please tell me you have colored pencils." The fox shook his head woefully.  
  
Yusuke sighed, going over to a wall and banging his head into it repeatedly.  
  
"Looks like we're going to Wal-Mart."  
  
*~~~~~~~~~~~~*  
  
Cheeto: Review! 


	4. Walmart for all!

"Can I get this?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Can I get this?"  
  
"No."  
  
"How about this?"   
  
"No."  
  
"What about-"  
  
"NO!" Hiei yelled, Genkai sticking her tongue out at him from the little kid's seat in the cart. They were searching for colored pencils, but in a Wal-mart the size of a shopping mall, that could be a little difficult.  
  
Yukina walked along side the fire demon, one hand clutching his pant leg, her eyes wandering the store in amazement.  
  
"Baka, get me this!" Shizuru yelled, holding up a bag of Oreos. Kuwabara snatched them from her, dangling them over her head.  
  
"Now who's bigger?" He snickered, Shizuru glaring at him. She ran up and rammed her foot into his.  
  
"OW!" he dropped the bag, which she grabbed and ran off with.  
  
"Wow, and I thought being beaten by a clown was pathetic." Hiei snorted.  
  
"Shut-up shrimp!"Yusuke snickered, holding Keiko in his arms as he looked around.  
  
"How in the hell are we supposed to find anything?" The punk demanded; as far as he knew, they were somewhere in the mile long fishing department.  
  
"May I suggest we split up?" Kurama said, struggling to walk, as Botan had permanently attached herself to his leg.  
  
"Yeah!" Keiko squealed, "Let's go to the Barbie section!" Yusuke rolled his eyes.  
  
"Alright, we'll meet back here in twenty minutes." They all nodded and split up, going their respective directions.  
  
***  
  
Shizuru ran through the isles, grinning when she spotted a large McDonald's in one corner of the store. Running to the gardening section, (which was conveniently near by), she tore open a bag of top soil and rubbed herself down with it, ripping her clothes and messing up her hair, sticking leaves into it as she ran back.  
  
She shuffled up to the counter, looking up at the female teenager behind the counter. "Can I get some food?"  
  
"You got any money, kid?"  
  
Let a well trained pet, Shizuru burst into tears.  
  
  
  
***  
  
Yusuke wandered through the store, checking out the isle names. "Man, we are never going to find these things! This place is huge!"  
  
Keiko ignored him. "Can I get a Barbie?"  
  
"You already have a Barbie!"  
  
"Can I get another one?" Yusuke glared at her.  
  
"What's wrong with the one you've got?"  
  
"It's ugly, I want that one!" She squealed, jumping from his arms and running over to a display rack, grabbing a bright pink box with a Barbie in it that looked almost exactly like the one she had.  
  
"That's the same one!"  
  
"Nu-uh!" Keiko yelled. "Her lips are different! And her dress is prettier!" Yusuke rolled his eyes and grabbed the box, putting it back on the rack.  
  
"No. Now let's go get your stupid pencils." Keiko's lips quivered and her eyes began to water.  
  
"If-you don't-get it-for me . .I'll cry!" She threatened.  
  
"Keiko-"  
  
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"  
  
***  
  
"And my pimp brother spends all his money on weed, or paying the bill for the minivan we live in." Shizuru explained as she wolfed down her fifth burger, stuffing fries into her mouth and drowning it down with soda. "I used to be addicted to meth, but then they got me on the white powder."  
  
"You poor dear!" A woman cooed. "Here, eat some more. When's the last time you ate?"  
  
"A few days ago." Shizuru explained, sending one of the employee's running to get her a refill. "Yeah, we ate our cat. Sometimes he sends me out into the woods to catch squirrels for dinner." The people gasped in horror.  
  
"But that's only if his one of his crack whore girlfriends doesn't bring back any cash." Kuwabara just then ran up, gasping at Shizuru's condition.  
  
"Shizuru!" he yelled, grabbing her. "What are you doing?! Let's go!"  
  
"You should be ashamed of yourself." A woman growled. "Feeding your little sister a cat. You disgust me."  
  
Kuwabara visibly paled and he grabbed Shizuru, shaking her. "You ate Eikichi?! You ATE Eikichi?!" He turned and sprinted for the exit. "EIKICHI!"  
  
***  
  
Botan, while Kurama was being mauled by his fan club, had somehow wandered into the pet department.  
  
"Fishy!" she cooed, tapping the glass as the goldfish swum around in circles, looking bored.  
  
"What are you doing in there fishy? It's all small." She frowned. "I know what to do!"  
  
  
  
Kurama broke away from his fan club and was now running down the aisles, searching for the little girl. He passed the pet section, then noticed something strange . . .  
  
There were no fish in the tanks.  
  
"Oh no." He ran to the girl's bathroom nearby, thanking Kami that it was almost empty  
  
"Be free fishy!"  
  
*flush*  
  
"Find your home!"  
  
*flush*  
  
"Botan!" he yelled, bursting into one of the stalls.  
  
"EEP! PERVERT!" *Slap*  
  
"Uh, very sorry ma'am!" Kurama yelped, beet red as the woman stormed out of the bathroom. He cautiously approached the next stall and knocked, then pushed the door open.  
  
Botan stood over the toilet, dropping fish by fish into the water and flushing, wishing each good luck in the wild. Kurama grabbed the girl and the remaining fish swimming in a plastic bag, and exited the bathroom, breathing a sigh of relief that they weren't caught.  
  
"Ahem." He turned and saw a Wal mart employee glowering at him. "What do you think you were doing?"  
  
Kurama grinned sheepishly and struggled for words, while Botan frowned. "We were freeing the fishes from your evil enslavement!" Kurama clapped a hand over the girls mouth and back away, then turned and ran.  
  
"Free the fishies! Free the fishies!" Botan yelled around the fox's hand as he ran off to find Yusuke.  
  
***  
  
"GET BACK HERE!" Hiei yelled as he chased after Genkai and Yukina, who were racing away in their Hot Wheels mini car. He would have caught them by now, but Genkai was making it even harder by shooting off small blasts of energy, knocking over shelves, small children, employees, etc. In response, Hiei was just kind of plowing through everything and everyone.  
  
"Mommy, the mean man STEPPED ON ME!" Now, Hiei was chasing Genkai and Yukina, and was being chased by a four hundred pound woman that was surprisingly agile.  
  
"I think we lost him!" Yukina cheered as she and Genkai turned around in her plastic chair, not seeing the fire demon. Genkai grinned and turned up the radio, bopping along.  
  
"I don't think so." The two girls whipped around to see a not very happy Hiei standing in front of them, glowering.  
  
"Ahh!" Genkai slammed on the gas, ramming Hiei in the calve.  
  
"You little brat!" He yelled, clutching his leg. Genkai backed up, pulled a u-ey, and sped away.  
  
***  
  
Sorry it took so long to update! Grades=evil. I'm kinda in a rush, so latta!  
  
Sensei: review! 


	5. Yay for Sugar and Toilet paper!

Cheeto: Hiya peoples! MERRY LATE CHRISTMAS!!!!! I'm really, really, REALLY *REALLY* sorry for not updating for forever. I don't have a good excuse, I'm just incredibly lazy . . . ^-^; Oh, and it was my birthday six days ago! *dances* Go me!!! I finally turned . . . *glances around for creepy internet child molesters* . . .thirty six?   
  
But anyways, without further ado, the next chapter of "No Need For Chibis!!!" eeep!  
  
*~Chapter Five~*  
  
"Yuuuuusuke, can I get this?"  
  
"Keiko-"  
  
"WAAAAAAA."  
  
"FINE!" Keiko grinned and grabbed the stuffed dog off the shelf, then continued skipping down the isles. Yusuke stumbled after her, weighed down with five Barbies, two Easy Bake Ovens, and six My Little Ponies.  
  
"Yuuuuusuke, can-"  
  
"NO!" He yelled, letting all of his packages clatter to the floor, grabbing the little girl's hand. "We're leaving right now!" Keiko dropped the stuffed elephant and turned back to him, eyes large and tear filled. She began to sniffle, then wail convincingly.  
  
"You-never-get-me-ANYTHING!" She screeched. People stopped to stare at him and the sobbing girl. "You MEANIE POO HEAD!"  
  
"Keiko . . ." Saying her name just made her scream louder.  
  
"What an awful person." People were muttering as they passed, glaring at the poor boy. "Poor girl, she only wants a stuffed animal." Yusuke looked like he was about to cry.  
  
"Keiko, don't cry anymore." He said pleadingly. "I'll get you the stupid elephant!"  
  
"HE ISN'T STUPID!"  
  
"Okay, whatever, just don't cry anymore?" She sniffed a few times and wiped her eyes with her sleeve. She looked up at him and smiled. "KAY!" She let go of his hand and began to skip some more, then stopped. Yusuke winced and waited for the screaming to start.   
  
Keiko began what looked like a spin-off of The River Dance, biting her lip and spinning around. She ran up and grabbed Yusuke's pant leg, tugging it madly. "I have to go potty." She whispered urgently.  
  
"Come on Keiko, can't it wait?"  
  
"I have to go NOW!"  
  
Botan sat in Kurama's arms as he searched for Yusuke, trying to avoid any Wal-Mart employees he might see.  
  
"Shuuuuuichi-kun!" The shrill shriek stopped Kurama dead in his tracks. He winced and turned around, plastering a fake smile on his face. Three girls ran up, all giggling and blushing madly.  
  
"Oh, Shuichi, I never knew you were a family man!" One giggled, looking at Botan. "She's so cute! Can I see her?" Before the fox could object, she scooped the little girl out of his arms.  
  
"Aren't you a little sweetie?" She cooed in a baby voice, poking the toddler's nose.  
  
Botan bit her.  
  
The woman screeched and dropped her, clutching her red finger as Botan sped off.  
  
"No!" Kurama cried and pushed past the three girls, two of which were comforting the bitten one. When they noticed he was gone, then began to cry.  
  
"Wait, Shuichi-kun, don't go!"  
  
***  
  
Keiko, still jumping around madly, followed Yusuke to the two doors labeled 'Male' and 'Female.'  
  
"Okay, we're here, go on in." Keiko looked up at him pleadingly.  
  
"I can't go by myself." Yusuke blanched. "What?! How hard can it be? You just sit and go, right?" Keiko looked like she was going to cry.  
  
"Alright, come on." He said and headed for the Men's room.  
  
"No!" Keiko said and jogged in place. "That's the *boys* room."  
  
"So what?"  
  
"I can't go into the *boys* room!" Yusuke frowned, then pointed to a sign, reading it aloud. "Children of the opposite sex may use restrooms if they are five or under. You're like what, four? It's fine, come on." Keiko shook her head vigorously.  
  
"I'm a girl, I have to go to the *girls* room."  
  
"Then go!"  
  
"I don't wanna go by myself!" She wailed. "And I gotta go really BAD!" Yusuke frowned.  
  
"I can't go into the ladies room with you!"  
  
"You HAVE to!" Just then, Kurama ran up.  
  
"Have you seen Botan?!" Yusuke grinned.  
  
"Hey, Kurama, you look like a girl, take Keiko to the bathroom." Kurama fixed him with a level stare, denoting that as a bad idea. "I take that as a no." With that, he sped off.  
  
Yusuke looked down at Keiko, then, with a defeated sigh, took her hand and led her into the Ladies room.  
  
***  
  
Botan giggled as she looked back, having finally lost the fox. Sadly, she wasn't looking where she was going and ran head first into an isle, the force sending her sprawling. A heavy white and pink bag fell off one of the shelves, exploding once it made contact with the floor, spilling its contents everywhere.  
  
Botan stood and dusted herself off, walking over to inspect the crash site. Taking a handful of the grainy white substance, she shoved it in her mouth.  
  
"Mmmm." She moaned and took another handful, stuffing that into her mouth as she inspected the label.  
  
"S-U-G-A-R." She stared at it for a moment more, trying to digest the letters, then shrugged. Plopping onto the ground, she began to feast on the new treat.  
  
***  
  
Yusuke kept a hand over his eyes as he stepped into the bathroom, women letting out shrieks as they spotted the boy.  
  
"Oh, come on! I'm not even looking!" He yelled. Keiko smiled and ran to the stall, locking the door behind her.   
  
Yusuke leaned against the wall, red staining his cheeks as he waited for the little girl to finish.  
  
"Are you done yet?"  
  
"No!" She yelled. He waited a few more seconds.  
  
"Now?"  
  
"NO!"  
  
"How long does it take?!" He waited a bit more, then asked again. One more, the same response met him. Peeking between his fingers, Yusuke found that the bathroom was mostly empty, and knocked on her stall.  
  
"I'm not done yet!" She yelled. Yusuke sighed and sweat dropped, looking at his watch.  
  
  
  
***  
  
Keiko pulled up her pants and flushed the toilet, watching as the water swirled down the drain. She giggled and flushed again, giggling some more.  
  
"Are you done yet?"  
  
"No!" she yelled, dropping the end of the toilet paper roll into the toilet and flushing again, giggling as the roll spun madly, feeding out more and more paper.  
  
Then she realized something. It wasn't flushing anymore. She tried the lever again, but more water just filled up. She tried again and again, but it didn't work. Frowning, she reached up to undo the lock, but it was stuck! Her frown deepening, she crawled under one of the stall's walls into the next stall, and kept going.  
  
Yusuke hung his head, sighing heavily, when he noticed something strange. There was water coming out from under the door. Lifting his foot, he wrinkled his nose in disgust, then thought of something.  
  
"Keiko?" he said, trying to pull open the door. Locked. He jiggled the handle, calling out her name again. When it didn't budge, he began to get worried.  
  
"Keiko?!" he yelled, ramming the door with his shoulder. While he was doing this, the little girl calmly walked out the entrance.  
  
***  
  
  
  
Botan screamed at the top of her lungs as she ran down the isles, running into things, falling down, getting back up, then running around screaming some more.  
  
She kept running and turned a corner, plowing into the legs of someone and fell on her butt. She looked up to see an annoyed Wal-Mart employee.  
  
"Little girl, where are your parents?" Botan looked up at him.  
  
"YOURE GAY!" She yelled and felling into a fit of giggles, laughing like it was the funniest thing she ever heard. She rolled around on the ground as she howled with laughter while the employee looked around awkwardly.  
  
"Um, I'm going to have to take you to the front and call your parents." She suddenly went sullen.  
  
"I'm an orphan." He looked at her sadly. "Oh . . ., um . .okay . ."  
  
"I GOT YOU SO GOOD!" She yelled, giggling hysterically. "But don't worry, I'm on sale for $2.99! Roll 'em back, roll em out! ALWAYS LOW PRICES AT WAL-MART! I am the product of faceless corporate companies that sacrifice human morals and the jobs of millions to put more money in their pockets just to spend more on themselves and the growth of their companies under the façade of helping people!" The employee sweat dropped. "I AM ZORRO!" He watched her blow raspberries in impersonation of an airplane, spread her arms, and run off.  
  
"And they say my generation is bad . ." he muttered as he fingered his lip ring.  
  
Botan raced past the clothing isles and the jewelry counter. She backtracked a few steps, and stared at the necklaces and rings. "Shiny . ."  
  
A woman at the jewelry counter looked down at her and smiled. "Can I help you?" Botan looked up at her, sparkles in her eyes.  
  
"I like shiny things." The woman stared at her strangely.  
  
"Botan!" Kurama yelled and grabbed her. "No more running away, we are leaving right now!" He said. She stared at him.  
  
"Can we go to the circus?"  
  
"What?" He raised an eyebrow as he started away from the counter. Botan looked over his shoulder and screeched in disapproval.  
  
"NO! THE SHINEY! DON'T TAKE ME AWAY FROM THE SHINEY!"  
  
***  
  
Kurama spotted Yusuke, who was sitting on a bench past the check out counters. There was no Keiko.  
  
"Yusuke, wh-"  
  
"The toilet ate Keiko." He wailed, Kurama quirking an eyebrow. "Yusuke, I hate to tell you, but-"  
  
"Excuse me sir." A nasal voice echoed behind him. Kurama turned, annoyed at being interrupted again, and tried to contain a smirk. "Does this belong to you?"  
  
"Keiko!" He cried and jumped up, grabbing the girl and squeezing her. "Where-"  
  
"And tell her to stay away from the make-up section." Keiko looked at the boy and grinned, the lipstick that was smeared all over her face leaving an imprint on his jacket, along with the globs of mascara and the eye-shadow that went halfway up her forehead. That and she had so much rouge on she looked like she had tuberculosis.  
  
"Okay." Yusuke grinned. "Now let's get out of here. Where's Kuwa-" He was cut off when an entire self of dishwashing soap came crashing down on a gaggle of sale-seeking Wal-Mart shoppers. Genkai and Yukina slid out in their Hotwheels car, spun, and sped away. Hiei followed closely, turning to glare at the other boys.  
  
"What are you waiting for, help me catch them you bakas!"  
  
***  
  
The three boys stepped out of the store, a package containing the ever-elusive colored pencils. Along with that, Yusuke had purchased a leash that was now secured around Genkai, who was pouting as she followed reluctantly. The spotted a large crowd of people, and drew closer out of curiosity.  
  
"And if we don't get the rent paid this month, then we'll lose the orphanage and all the children will be forced onto the street into prostitution." Shizuru 'sobbed.' "And then none of us will get a Christmas!" She wailed, people empting their wallets into her McDonalds cup.  
  
"Oh, you poor thing!" They cooed. "How awful!" The boys groaned, Yusuke running forward, grabbing her and pulling her out of the crowd.  
  
"What are you doing?!" he demanded, then looked over to her cup. "Damn, how much you got there?" She stuck her tongue out at him and tucked it under her *tattered* coat. "Be right back." She ran off, then appeared moments later, lugging a clear bag crammed full of McDonalds products that was bigger than she was.  
  
"I am not even going to ask." Yusuke said, making a mental note to take Shizuru out more. "Where's your brother?"  
  
She shrugged. "I dunno, he ran off muttering about his cat." Yusuke rolled his eyes, Kurama sighing heavily. "Let's just go before you get into more trouble." They started walking out to the fox's car, when a voice stopped them.  
  
"Hold it right there."  
  
"Oh, no."  
  
****  
  
Review! ^-^ 


	6. If you're happy and you know it!

Cheeto: OMG, over three months without an update? Wow, I'm really slipping. Sorry, about that, homies. But now I'm in a new house, and I've got a new story and lots of other fun stuff! ^-^  
  
Man, I never knew how hard it is to write humor. *rubs head* Man, this fic is more difficult than my action one. . . .*le sigh* But I'm trying peeps. Anyways, I don't own anything . .blah blah blah . . .  
  
Shameless plug: Oh, and my new story is a YYH/Harry Potter X-over. Read it! It's good, I promise! ^-^  
  
So anyways, here it is: Chapter 6?  
  
*~Chapter 6?~*  
  
The four boys stumbled into Kurama's house, collapsing into various overstuffed chairs and onto the couch. The girls skipped in after them, clutching their colored pencils and paper. Keiko also had an Easy-Bake-Oven, which she had demanded from Yusuke after the manager of the Wal-Mart stopped them in the parking lot, hauled them back to the store, and ripped poor Kurama a new one, somehow finding him to blame.  
  
"Hey, you guys are back!" Kuwabara poked his head out of then kitchen, grinning at them. "Man, I'm never going back to that place again!"  
  
"Gee, glad you feel that way!" Yelled Yusuke. "Since we've been banned from *that* Wal-mart, *all* Wal-marts in existence, *any* Wal-marts to be built in the future, any store *ending* in Mart, and TARGET!"  
  
Botan was still bouncing off her sugarhigh."KuwaKuwaKuwadowehaveanycookiesIwantaCookieCanIhave  
  
acookiepleasepleaspleasepl-"  
  
*Thud*  
  
Botan went from jumping around like a chattering teeth toy to a lump on the floor in two seconds flat.   
  
"Is she dead?"  
  
Kurama dragged himself off the couch and knelt next to the girl, shaking her gently. "Out cold. The sugar wore off." he picked her up and carried her upstairs, returning moments later.  
  
  
  
All the other the girls were laying on the carpeted floor with their paper and pencils, scribbling carefully, little faces puckered in concentration.  
  
The boys enjoyed their moment of relaxation. Shizuru drew furiously, grinned and held up her paper, admiring it. Standing up, she walked over to a Kuwabara, who had joined them and was sprawled in a chair. She climbed into his lap.  
  
Kuwabara eyed her carefully, and she gave him a sweet smile. "What?"  
  
"I wanted to show you my picture!" She said innocently, holding up the paper. "See, this is me." She pointed to a lopsided stick figure with brown squiggles come out of what he presumed was the head. "And that's you." She then pointed at another, much taller figure that was just as deformed.  
  
Kuwabara raised an eyebrow. "What's that?" He pointed at a large blue mushroom cloud where his stick figure's head should be.  
  
"Oh, I blew up your head." She smiled winningly, pointing to the ground under the stick figures feet. "See, there's the blood, and some brains."  
  
Kuwabara stared at her for a few minutes. "There's something wrong with you."  
  
Genkai glared at her picture, ripped it in half, and stood up. "I'M BORED!"  
  
"What?!" Yusuke demanded. "I just got banned from every Wal-Mart in existence so you could draw for FIVE MINUTES?!"   
  
Genkai stuck her tongue out at him. "I'M BORED!" She screamed. The other girls looked at her, then seconds later:  
  
"I'M BORED!" They all screamed.  
  
"We want a park!" Genkai screeched.  
  
"PARK!" The other girls echoed at the tops of their voices.  
  
"With trees!"  
  
"TREES!"  
  
"And grass!"  
  
"GRASS!"  
  
  
  
"But the nearest park like that is twenty . .minutes. .away. ." Kurama trailed off and groaned, slumping back into the cushions of the dark couch.  
  
"Well, at least Botan's asleep . ."  
  
"PAAAAARRRRKKK!"A shrill voice screeched; a flash of blue flying down the stairs. "PARKPARKPARKPARK!" Botan squealed, jumping up and down like the Engergizer Bunny, the sugar having apparently kicked back in.  
  
"Oh Kami." Yusuke moaned, flopping back into the seat.  
  
***  
  
"IF . .YOU'RE. . .HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT-CLAP YOUR HANDS!"  
  
*CLAP CLAP*  
  
"IF . .YOU'RE . . .HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT-CLAP YOUR HANDS!"  
  
*CLAP CLAP*  
  
"IF YOUR HAPPY AND YOU KNOW AND YOU REALLY WANNA SHOW IT-IF YOUR HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS!"  
  
*CLAP CLAP*  
  
" . . ."  
  
" . . ."  
  
"IF . . YOU'RE. . .HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS!"  
  
*CLAP CLAP*  
  
Hiei glared over at the chibi brunette sitting in Yusuke's lap who was leading the chorus, wondering if he could strangle her without the punk noticing. Yukina sat in the fire demon's lap, jumping around happily, screeching loudly and clapping to the music. Botan, who was squashed in the middle seat between he and Yusuke, mimicked her actions. Kuwabara was up front, his head bent to the side to accommodate the PT Cruisers' low roof. Shizuru was on his lap, the girl also enjoying the festivities of the incredibly repetitive song. Genkai, who was crammed in the tiny seat between him and Kurama, the driver, enjoyed singing extra-loudly seemingly just to piss them off.  
  
"IF . .YOU'RE . . . HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS!"  
  
  
  
*CLAP CLAP*  
  
WEEEEEOOOOOWWWW . . WWWWEEEEOOOOWWWW . . .  
  
The blaring siren interrupted the girl's song, but just for a moment.  
  
"IF YOU'RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT AND YOU REALLY WANNA-"  
  
WEEEEEOOOOWWWW . . WWWWEEEEOOOOWWW  
  
"-SHOW IT-IF YOUR HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS!"  
  
WWEEEEEOOOOWWW . .WWWEEEEOOOOOWWWW  
  
*CLAP CLAP*  
  
"AAAGGGHHHH!" Kurama yelled and pulled over sharply as the officer signaled him, turning off the car and banging his head against the steering wheel.  
  
"Hey, Kurama." Yusuke said slyly as he leaned forward, nearly crushing Keiko against the back of the driver's seat. "Don't worry, you look like a girl! Just bat your eyes a couple of times and we'll be off the hook!"  
  
"Do you suppose I should flash him too, Yusuke?" Kurama asked, his voice dripping sarcasm.  
  
Yusuke apparently missed this. He blinked. "Uh . .only if you think that'll work . ."  
  
The police officer strode up lazily, tapping on Kurama's window. The fox plastered a false grin on his face as the window rolled down.  
  
"Yes officer?"  
  
"Could I see you're license and registration, ma'am?" Yusuke snickered and nudged him from behind. Kurama rolled his eyes and dug through his wallet, handing the officer his ID.  
  
"Uh . . sir . . Do you know how . ." He peered into the backseat. ". . how many people you got in that car?"  
  
"Uh . ."   
  
"Violation of seat-belt law . . two hundred dollars." The officer muttered, scribbling on a small notepad of paper, tearing a slip off and passing it to the fox.  
  
  
  
"Now, how fast where you going?"  
  
"The speed limit?" Yusuke snorted from the back seat.  
  
"You were going sixty-three. . fifty dollar fine." The officer said and passed him another ticket.  
  
"But the speed limit's sixty!" Kurama sputtered.  
  
"Are you questioning my judgment?" The officer demanded, glaring at Kurama and scribbling down once again on his small pad. "Harassment of an officer . .hundred dollar fine." The man was passing Kurama the slip when the wind whipped it from his hands.  
  
"Sir, did you just throw that ticket out your window?" The officer yelled loudly. "Littering! Two hundred dollars!"  
  
"You dropped it!" Kurama cried in exasperation.  
  
"DO NOT RAISE YOUR VOICE AT ME SIR!"  
  
"I'M NOT RAISING MY VOICE!" Kurama shouted, finally cracking under the stress. The officer grabbed his gun and backed away.  
  
"GET OUT OF THE CAR, SIR! I WILL NOT ASK YOU AGAIN!" He grabbed his radio, screaming into it. "I NEED BACK-UP! I'VE GOT A HOSTILE DRIVER ON ROUTE 18, ARMED AND DANGEROUS!"  
  
"I'M NOT ARMED!"  
  
"SIR, STEP OUT OF THE CAR WITH YOUR HANDS UP!" As Kurama began to get out, the officer fired three shots into the door.  
  
"EXIT THE VEHICLE WITH YOUR HANDS UP!"  
  
"HE WOULD IF YOU QUIT SHOOTING YOU FRICKING PSYCHO!" Yusuke yelled from the backseat.  
  
"DO NOT GET INVOLVED SIR!" Kurama stepped out of the car with his hands up and the officer sprinted forward, grabbing the fox's hands, bending them behind his back and cuffing them.  
  
"Scum like you makes me SICK!" The officer yelled as he hauled the fox back to his patrol car and stuffed him in the back seat. "You're going away for a long time!" Slamming the door after him, the officer returned to the PT Cruiser, ducking his head inside the open driver's side window.  
  
  
  
"Uh, sorry about the inconvenience, sirs. Just trying to make the streets a safer place." He returned to his car and sped away.  
  
"Hey Kurama, don't drop the soap in the shower!" Yusuke yelled after the fleeing vehicle and snickered, settling back into his seat. They all sat there for a moment.  
  
"Uhh . . so who gets to drive?' They all looked at each other.  
  
"Don't even think about it." Hiei growled.  
  
"Shizuru hasn't taught me to drive yet." Kuwabara said, the two boys looking at Yusuke. The punk grinned, pushed Keiko off his lap and climbed from the back to sit in the driver's seat.  
  
He cracked his knuckles loudly, placing his hands on the wheel and looking down at his feet. "Okay, now, which one of these is the gas?"  
  
***  
  
Cheeto: Once again, I am very sorry for the incredibly late update. *grovels.* Oh, and incase no one knows, PT Cruisers are about the smallest cars to ever exist. Not including two-seaters. ^-^  
  
Sensei: Review please! 


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